The Wizard of Demeter — Law of Demeter as 80s dark-fantasy metal | The Principles (B2)

Law of Demeter, sung as 80s dark-fantasy metal. Side B, track 2 of The Principles: eight software principles, each recorded twice, A-side and B-side in opposite moods. Liner notes (animated diagram + code for every principle): https://claude.ai/artifact/ToeRLw8vTo... Listen to the album: https://distrokid.com/hyperfollow/the... The rule: Talk to your friends, not to their friends. Don't reach through one object into another. Where it stops being simple: If dots are the problem, why is items.filter().map() fine? The answer is in the liner notes. Flip it over: A2 · One Dot Only LYRICS Hush now, child of the codebase... There are things in the dark between the dots You hold a reference to a friend, and the friend is true But behind him lies a stranger, and the stranger's watching you He'll offer you his wallet, he'll offer you his gold Reach into his pocket and your soul is bought and sold One dot... two dots... THREE DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS! They're coupled to your heart! DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS! One change tears you apart! Down the getter chain, into the night a.getB().getC().getD(), NO! The Wizard of Demeter carved the law in stone "Speak unto your neighbours, leave their entrails alone" But the Fool reached through the Order, through the Customer, through the Street Now the Address changed its shape and the build lies in defeat! Tell... don't ask Tell... don't ask Command the object, never pry Or the NullPointer comes to claim you when you die The streams may chain forever, the builders chain in light For they return their own kind, and their kind will treat you right It's not the dots that damn you, it's the walls you cross within When you dig through other's bones... that's where the darkness begins DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS! DON'T TALK TO STRANGERS! ONE DOT! ONE DOT! ONE DOT ONLY! Music and vocals generated with Suno; lyrics written with AI assistance (Claude). Concept, picks and edits by The Principles. #ThePrinciples #LawofDemeter #softwareengineering #programming #metal