"You Need Help to Help Her" Our Daughter Had a Breakdown: Where Should We Begin? with Esther Perel

In this week's classic session, a husband and wife are united in their desire to help their daughter, two years after she suffered a breakdown and moved home, shutting herself off from her family and friends. Esther urges them to examine the way pressure and expectations – no matter how well-intentioned – can shape a child’s upbringing. Chapters 00:00 What Happens When a Family Begins to Fracture? 01:36 Why Does the Daughter Feel So Alone? 02:36 How Do Parents Cope When Love Turns to Exhaustion? 03:04 Can Therapy Offer a Way Forward? 03:32 What Triggers the Daughter’s Sudden Shift? 04:47 What Lies Beneath the Family’s Pain? 07:33 What Can Therapy Reveal That the Family Can’t See? 12:32 Why Is It So Hard for Them to Talk to Each Other? 19:58 How Does Adoption Shape Identity and Belonging? 22:11 Can Understanding the Past Change the Present? 23:22 How Does Fear Silence a Family? 23:57 What Happens When a Child Feels She Doesn’t Belong? 25:34 How Much Responsibility Should Family Carry for One Another’s Pain? 27:21 How Do Power and Depression Intersect at Home? 28:50 Can Family Therapy Really Heal Old Wounds? 32:25 How Do You Stay Present When Suicide Enters the Conversation? 36:27 When Is It Time to Ask for Help Beyond the Family? 38:42 What Does True Healing Look Like for Everyone Involved? About Where Should We Begin?: Every Monday morning, step into the office of iconic psychotherapist Esther Perel and listen in as real people in search of insight bare the raw, intimate, and profound details of their stories. From breakups and open relationships to workplace conflicts and fractures in the family, it’s a place to hear our own stories reflected in the lives of others. Access exclusive bonus content by subscribing on Substack here: https://estherperel.substack.com About Esther Perel: Psychotherapist, relationship expert, and New York Times bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships. Fluent in nine languages, she helms a therapy practice in New York City and serves as an organizational consultant for Fortune 500 companies around the world. Her celebrated TED Talks have garnered more than 40 million views and her bestselling books, Mating in Captivity and The State of Affairs, are global phenomena translated into more than 30 languages. Esther is also the host of the hit podcast Where Should We Begin? which is available on Apple Podcasts. Learn more at EstherPerel.com or by following @EstherPerelOfficial on Instagram.