Twilight: A 104 Year Old Stalker and a 0/10 Legal Score | Let's Ruin It

We finally did Twilight, and the great American love story turns out to be a five movie crime spree. We are three real attorneys from New Jersey and we went through the whole saga, not just the first movie. From the Cullens fabricating fresh birth certificates, diplomas and Social Security numbers every time they move towns, to Carlisle turning his dying 17 year old patient without a word of consent, to whether needing blood to survive is actually a defense to murder, there are crimes here in places even we did not expect. Then there is the Volturi, an entire government with no trials, no appeals and exactly one sentence, and the small matter of Edward sitting in Bella's bedroom watching her sleep months before anybody introduced themselves. We argue about whether a mind reader could ever be put on a witness stand, whether Alice is liable for the vision that sent Edward to Volterra to die, whether Carlisle committed malpractice by leaving town before the world's first vampire C section, and whether Renesmee violates a law that was written long before anything like her existed. Then Jacob imprints on a newborn and this recording nearly ends in a real fight. Legal accuracy: zero out of ten. Enjoyment: a thousand out of ten. That gap is the entire reason this show exists. Let's Ruin It, where your favorite movies go to get cross-examined. CHAPTERS 00:00 – Introduction: Team Edward, Team Jacob, and Five Movies to Ruin 05:02 – Is a Brand New Identity Every Few Years Just Fraud? 16:52 – Can Carlisle Turn a Dying 17 Year Old Without Asking? 23:12 – Is Being a Vampire a Legal Defense to Murder? 31:47 – The Volturi: No Trials, No Appeals, No Due Process 39:45 – Could Alice's Visions or Edward's Mind Reading Ever Be Evidence? 51:26 – Stalking, Trespass, and Dating a 104 Year Old Who Looks 17 59:44 – The Vampire C Section: Informed Consent and Malpractice 1:07:31 – Renesmee on Trial: Immortal Child Law and the Imprinting Problem 🎙️ ABOUT LET'S RUIN IT: We're three New Jersey attorneys who love destroying your favorite movies and TV shows with our legal analysis. New episodes every other week! 👩‍⚖️ YOUR HOSTS: Jenny (@birzlaw), Liz (@lizcalandrillo), Diana (@mrsladydiana) 📱 FOLLOW US: Podcast Instagram: @letsruinitpodcast Subscribe for full episodes and legal hot takes! 💼 DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for entertainment purposes only and does not constitute legal advice. If you need legal representation, please consult a qualified attorney in your jurisdiction.