#71 Kids Inherit Your Pain Cycle How Dads Learn to Self Regulate with Dr Terry Hargrave

Dr. Terry Hargrave, founder of Restoration Therapy, joins the Christian Dad Podcast to show why so many fathers stay stuck in reactivity. When a dad feels dismissed, insignificant, or unsafe, his brain defaults to the pain cycle—anger, withdrawal, blame, or control—and that reactivity damages both his marriage and his kids. Hargrave explains the practical way out: name the trigger, then deliberately speak the truth out loud (“I am valued by God; I am important”) so the prefrontal cortex can re-engage. From that regulated place, a father can show up in the “us-ness” of his marriage The episode challenges passive dads to stop waiting for their wife or kids to make them feel secure, and instead take responsibility for their own identity and sense of safety. Timeline: 1:30 The Pain Cycle & Peace Cycle 5:45 "You will not change, what you will not name" 9:45 Why Speaking the Truth Out Loud Works 18:00 The Power of “Us-Ness” in Marriage 24:30 When the Pain Cycle Damages the Fabric of the Family 32:22 God Cares More About How We Stay Together Than Solving the Problem 44:20 Parenting Yourself So You Can Show Up for Your Kids 47:00 You are the hinge of history. For your children you are the hinge of their identity. Dr. Terry Hargrove https://www.restorationtherapytrainin... https://www.amazon.com/s?k=Terry+Harg... James Pellicane https://www.happyhomeuniversity.com/c... Episode #71: Youtube:    • #71  Kids Inherit Your Pain Cycle  How Dad...   Itunes: https://podcasts.apple.com/jo/podcast... Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/1I6W...