I Thought It Was A Cushion - Warhammer 40K - Tavern Song - music for playing RPG

Track: I Thought It Was A Cushion Artist: Barhound ================ I hope you enjoyed this bardic banger straight out of the Underhive. Scroll down for full lyrics. This song is a part of our parody-fueled musical saga through the grim darkness of the 41st millennium! If you enjoyed it, please like and share with your folks. Subscribe for more awesome songs:    / @barhoundofficial   ================= 🔥Follow the ale-driven journey of Guardsman Garrie here:    • Guardsman Garrie Songs   🔥Apple Music:   / barhound   🔥Ale Fund:   / barhound   (As an indie musician, I pay for production, publishing and distribution. It would be great if you can support.) ================= 🛑 Disclaimer: This song is a fan-made parody and not associated with Games Workshop. All Warhammer 40K references belong to their rightful owners. This content is for satirical and entertainment purposes only. ================= 📜 Full lyrics: Baka-Baka! Boom-Boom! I’d had six shots of ale and two of regret, Just won a poker game with a sweaty tech-priest's bet. Saw a velvet lump on a warp-torn chair, And thought to meself, “Well, that looks fair!” I plopped me arse without a second look— It jiggled once and then it shook! She whispered, “Hello,” with a fiendish grin, And now I fear what I've awakened within... Baka-Baka! Boom-Boom! I thought it was a cushion, I swear on the Throne! Now I’ve got claws on my dreams and a high-pitched moan! I thought it was a pillow—just a Warp-shaped seat! Now she follows me whisperin’ “You like those cheeks?” I thought it was padding—soft and plush! Didn’t know I’d be haunted by a butt so lush! She shows up nightly in my bunkroom tent, Says, “Sit down, darling, pay the rent.” Her eyes are eight, her lips are blue, And her derrière’s got its own kill crew. Tried exorcism with a holy flame, But her booty just winked and called me lame. Even the Commissar won’t intervene— He saw her once and fled the scene! Baka-Baka! Boom-Boom! I thought it was a cushion, just standard gear! Now she twerks in my soup and humps my fear! I thought it was a pillow with luxurious squish, Not a Warp-touched daemon with a jiggly wish! I thought it was padding for my war-torn spine, Now she purrs, “That sweet seat is mine…” She braided hearts in my flak-vest straps, Leaves pink perfume in my ammo caps. She sings in tongues while I clean my gun, And humps to the rhythm of autocannon fun. The Chaplain says it’s a heresy curse— But truth be told, I’ve had far worse. She’s soft, she’s sharp, she’s mostly thighs— And I’m starting to like those daemonic sighs… Baka-Baka! Boom-Boom! I thought it was a cushion, but now I see— It’s a booty-bound bond 'tween her and me! I thought it was a pillow beneath my rear, But it’s love... or lust... or creeping fear! I thought it was a padding, warp-stitched fluff— Turns out Chaos cheeks are just my stuff! Cushion! It jiggled and it bit! Cushion! I sat and now I’m it! Cushion! The Warp plays rough! But her daemonic booty’s just the right fluff! Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! I thought it was a cushion, but now I see— It’s a booty-bound bond 'tween her and me! I thought it was a cushion beneath my rear, But it’s love... or lust... or creeping fear! I thought it was a cushion, warp-stitched fluff— Turns out Chaos cheeks are juuuust my stuff! #warhammer40k #wh40k #tavernmusic #darktide #spacemarine2 #epicmusic ================= 🛑AI Disclosure: Some elements of this track were enhanced using AI. Vocals and instruments are AI-assisted. My natural voice is smoother, and I primarily play acoustic rhythm and percussive guitar. The final mix includes AI-generated enhancements and additional instrumentation. Lyrics are written by me. I occasionally use ChatGPT for editing, proofing or rhyming help.