Please forgive me (mõned sõnad on valusamad kui teised,ela hästi)

I was fighting ghosts you couldn't see, carrying wounds I never let you touch. I was afraid of needing someone, so I pushed away the one who cared too much. You listened when I couldn't speak, you stayed when I was hard to reach. You searched for answers in my chaos, while I kept building walls between us. I thought I knew what love was then, I thought I had to run before it hurt. I never knew that losing you would be the thing that hurt the worst. And now I see what I couldn't see, now I know what you were giving me. But knowing doesn't change the past, and some mistakes are made to last. Please forgive me for every time I pushed you away. For every word I never meant, for every chance I threw away. Please forgive me for not knowing what I had. You were reaching for my heart while I was running from my past. I don't ask you to come back, I know your heart belongs somewhere else. I just need you to know I'm sorry for the girl I was. Please forgive me... even if you never do. I will carry what I lost because I know it was you. I've loved the wrong ones far too deeply, mistook the chaos for a flame. I kept chasing something broken, thinking pain was just another name for love. And then there was you — quietly standing at my door. You didn't promise me perfection, you just tried to understand me more. But I was drowning in my own mind, too scared to let somebody stay. So I made you hate the part of me that desperately wanted you to stay. If I could go back just one night, I'd put my pride aside. I'd tell you all the things I couldn't say, I'd let you see what I kept inside. Please forgive me for every time I pushed you away. For every word I never meant, for every chance I threw away. Please forgive me for not knowing what I had. You were reaching for my heart while I was running from my past. I don't ask you to come back, I know your heart belongs somewhere else. I just need you to know I'm sorry for the girl I was. Please forgive me... even if you never do. I will carry what I lost because I know it was you. Maybe in another life I wouldn't be so afraid. Maybe I'd recognize your love before I watched it fade. Maybe I'd take your hand instead of turning away. Maybe I'd tell you, "Don't give up on me today." But this is not another life. And you're not mine anymore. So all I have are memories and words I should have said before. Please forgive me I know I can't undo the past. I can't turn back the hands of time, I can't make forever last. Please forgive me for the love I couldn't receive. For making you pay for wounds that were never yours to heal. I won't ask you to return, I won't ask you to choose me. If loving you means letting go, then I'll let you be free. But somewhere underneath these scars, there's a woman finally seeing that the man she spent her life searching for was once standing right in front of her. Please forgive me... I was lost. I was afraid. I was fighting everything except the love you gave. And if you never hear these words, I'll still say them to the night: I'm sorry. I loved you too late. Please forgive me.