Choose Your Influences Very Carefully! - Lessons For My Kids #23

In this episode of Lessons for My Kids, Ryan Weiss shares personal stories from his own life about the power of influences, both positive and negative. He describes a group of high school friends whose main activities involved drinking and smoking weed, which eventually led to a breaking point after a wild weekend where he realized he was heading in the wrong direction. He cut ties with them and later found much better influences in college through a mastermind group focused on personal development, goal setting, and accountability. Ryan emphasizes that you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with, and these influences can unconsciously pull you up or drag you down depending on who you surround yourself with. Ryan explains that he consciously assesses his influences once a year using a tool from The Compound Effect, identifying who is having a positive or negative impact and deciding whether to expand or reduce certain relationships. He acknowledges the challenges involved, including the importance of loyalty, the risk of treating relationships too transactionally, and the reality that people are nuanced rather than purely good or bad influences. He suggests practical ways to handle this with balance, such as categorizing relationships by how much time you spend with someone (from five-minute friends to month-long friends) instead of making all-or-nothing decisions. Ryan recommends a better approach than simply cutting people off: take clear action in the direction you want to go, such as improving your health or marriage. This naturally attracts people who share those values and gradually reduces time spent with those who do not. He also highlights the value of mastermind groups for accountability and staying focused on your goals, and notes that mentors tend to appear when you demonstrate consistent action and a willingness to implement advice. Overall, Ryan encourages thoughtful, balanced decision-making around influences while prioritizing loyalty, self-awareness, and personal growth. Find the influence assessment I do every year here: https://thecompoundeffect.com/resources