He Called His House "The Queer Temple", Here's Why | EPI 45 #LindaLanga #podcast

He calls his home studio "The Queer Temple." In this episode of Lindalanga (At the Well), yoga teacher, artist, and queer space-holder Sala (Arrvinda Salwatura) talks about growing up gay in a Christian boys' school in Sri Lanka, locking his real self away for thirty years, and the moment that changed everything: the birth of his daughter. We talk guilt and shame, love versus fear in parenting, addiction as a coping mechanism, and why he now calls Sri Lanka "the gayest island on earth." Sala also opens up about building Salasbananas — his yoga, art, and queer wellness studio on the south coast — as a space for people to release what they carry and come home to themselves. ⚠️ Content note: this episode includes discussion of internalized homophobia and bullying, past alcohol/drug use, unsafe experiences from before coming out, and references to war and family trauma. Listener discretion advised. 🔗 Find Sala: Salasbananas Yoga & Art Studio — salasbananas.com | Instagram: @salasbananas 🎙️ LindaLanga (ළිඳ ළඟ) — conversations on identity, culture, politics, and queer Sri Lankan life, for Sri Lankans at home and abroad. Insta, Facebook, TikTok: LindaLangaPodcast 0:00:00 Intro & welcome 0:00:39 Who is Sala: yoga, art, and holding space for queer people 0:03:04 The story behind Salasbananas 0:05:04 Burning out in corporate life, learning to ask for help 0:09:30 What is guilt and shame, really? 0:10:31 Growing up Sinhala Buddhist, educated Christian, gay 0:12:09 Realizing he was "different" and it was dangerous 0:14:33 Building a second, safer self to survive 0:15:32 Why parents' fear comes from war and colonization 0:17:16 Supun's cricket story: shame as a forcing function 0:19:38 The photo card, rugby, and "it's the thighs" 0:22:39 First attraction, and locking his real self in a box 0:25:04 How his daughter's birth changed everything 0:29:04 Love vs. fear, and Brené Brown on control vs. connection 0:33:38 Passing fear down generationally — and how to stop 0:38:04 Traveling and co-parenting as a single gay dad 0:42:05 Alcohol, drugs, and unsafe experiences before coming out 0:44:16 On gay parenting and "not performing" as a parent 0:47:30 His daughter growing up knowing him fully 0:48:38 Crossing the fear of coming out 0:52:27 Queerness as sacred, and what colonization erased 0:56:35 Being undefined: queerness as a way of living 1:00:07 Inside Salasbananas: the "Queer Temple" 1:02:38 Invitation: support groups and community in the South 1:06:40 Reparenting himself, and finding Companions on a Journey 1:08:11 "Our island is the gayest island on earth" 1:10:23 Closing thoughts and thanks