My Song - Tired of Starting Over

Song Lyrics I know how to start again. That's the problem. I've done it so much, I barely even stop now. Something falls apart, I learn to live without it. Then people call me strong like that should help somehow. I used to believe each restart made me better. Now I just wonder what it took from me. A little less trust, a little less patience, A little less of who I used to be. And I hate hearing, "Maybe this is for you." What if some things were never meant to break? Why does every loss need some deeper meaning? Why can't I just be tired of what it takes? I'm tired of starting over, I really am. Tired of making new plans from broken plans. Don't tell me, "You've done it before." I know. That's exactly why I'm tired of letting go. I can start again. That's never been the question. I just don't know how many times I have left. And maybe all these restarts changed how I live. I don't give things everything I used to give. Part of me expects them not to last, So I hold something back before they even pass. Then I get mad when nothing feels like home. Like I had nothing to do with feeling alone. That's hard to admit, but maybe it's true. I've lost so much, I expect more to lose. Maybe I'm not scared of another ending. Maybe I'm scared I'll stop caring when it comes. Because every time I rebuild my whole life, It gets harder to believe I've really begun. I'm tired of starting over, I really am. Tired of making new plans from broken plans. Don't tell me, "You've done it before." I know. That's exactly why I'm tired of letting go. I can start again. That's never been the question. I just don't know how many times I have left. And that's the part I don't like saying out loud I don't miss everything that I had before. I miss believing things could stay for once. I miss not waiting for another closed door. Maybe I'll rebuild again. I probably will. Not because I'm brave. I just know the drill. But every time I tell myself, "Try once more," I believe those words a little less than before. #sadmusic #sadsong #chillmusic #lovesongs #popmusic #englishsongs #calmmusic #englishsong #newsong #hiphopsongs #hiphop #chillmusic #sadlyrics #sad