STAY; to tell someone about the possibilities of tomorrow // Suicide Grief + Suicide Awareness

September is suicide awareness month, and it was also my bio moms Brandi’s birthday month. this is when i start to really struggle in my grief + anxiety as everything is so LOUD. For someone who has lost someone this way, the conversation is never ending. Some people can post “stay!”, “check on your friends!”, a hotline, then forget about it until next September. I don’t get that choice. I am reminded 365 days a year of what happened to my mom, and how her passing has left our family. I’m stuck with the ptsd/trauma, the unanswered questions, fear of abandonment…but I am also left with knowledge, strength, and deep in my bones hope. 873 days since i last tried to take my life. 2 years, 8 months since my mom died. I didn’t know if I wanted to see tomorrow. I didn’t care to. Who says I’ve survived this? But I can choose to keep going, even when it’s hard. we can absolutely give credit to the many people that add to our lives and that keep us going through difficult times, because they “save us”, yep, but what about ourselves? what about the strength in our own selves? when we choose to stay through a problem that’s real heavy? a life altering trauma? when we choose to see that sun again? I can’t get away from the judgement and the ongoing stigma surrounding addiction/suicide, the rude comments about my mom, etc…but what i can do is continue to speak on my experiences, remind people to that it’s cool to care about others, gently encourage others to actually & actively check in, add a lil sparkle wherever I go, and educate people on the correct terminologies... it’s died by “suicide”, NOT “commited”. ;) i can’t bring my mom back, but i can know deep down that this is not the answer. i can’t tell you to stay, but i can tell you of all the joy and about the possibilities that you are worthy of sticking around for, tomorrow. your life matters. XOXO ♡ as jadenhossler says in his song… “Hold on when you have your doubts, Tell me the things that I don’t know So sick from all of the scars they left Searching for more than this life can give At night when you feel all alone, I’ll tell you about tomorrow.” #tellmeabouttomorrow “The darkest day will end, and the sun will rise, over and over again.” LINKS & RESOURCES: National 24-Hour Crisis Hotlines: 988 SUICIDE CRISIS : 988 Send a Text to 988 Text the word "HOME" to 741741 "9-8-8 is a three-digit suicide prevention helpline that provides live support by phone and text to everyone in US & Canada. It’s available across the country, in English and French, 24 hours a day, every single day of the year. Our goal is to prevent suicide by making it as simple as possible for people to get the help they need, when they need it. If you are thinking about suicide or worried about someone you know, 9-8-8 is here to support you. Suicide affects people of all ages and backgrounds. Whoever you are, wherever you are located, whatever time or day it is, you can call 9-8-8 if you need to talk to someone." ----------------------------------------------------- MY VIDEOS: "BREE TALKS" PLAYLIST (A whole playlist of me blabbing or sharing my experiences :    • “Bree Talks” Videos: (Experiences, Chats e...   ---------------------------------------------- You are wanted here, You are loved and very much cared for. Somebody is rooting for you. Subscribe, Like, Leave video Suggestions Down Below, Comment! Thank you (as always) for watching! I appreciate it! Connect with me: Instagram- @encouragingbyoutube