Jesus on Divorce | Matthew 19:1-12

Introduction: It is not without purpose that immediately following our Lord’s teaching on forgiveness, Matthew records Christ’s encounter with the Pharisees on the subject of divorce. There is no relationship in a person’s life where Christ’s standard for forgiveness is more tested. There is no relationship in a person’s life where hardness of heart will prove more devastating. There is no relationship where common sense proves more inadequate and divine wisdom more necessary. Apart from practicing forgiveness a marriage cannot survive — or if it does survive formally, it disintegrates relationally. What Jesus teaches about forgiveness MUST BE PRACTICED IN OUR HOMES. There is no way to maintain sweet fellowship, in any relationship, without humble confession of sin and gracious forgiveness — and that includes marriage. But marriages are not just built on the truth of forgiveness. Marriage is built on the conviction of what God has revealed marriage to be. NO MARRIAGE WILL EVER BE STRONGER THAN IT’S VIEW OF MARRIAGE. In our verses, the Pharisees want to talk about divorce, but Jesus wants to the talk about marriage. The Pharisees want to talk about how Moses regulated divorce, Jesus wants to talk about how God’s — FROM THE VERY BEGINNING — made clear that marriage is be respected and defended. THE PHARISEES EMPHASIZE THE QUESTION, “WHEN IS DIVORCE PERMISSIBLE”? JESUS EMPHASIZED BY HIS ANSWER, “WHAT GOD HAS JOINED TOGETHER, MAN MUST NOT TO SEPARATE.” If God is to be honored, if His will is to be obeyed, if His name is to be upheld — IN MARRIAGE — then we must be willing to listen to the One who created it and came from heaven to earth and is now instructing us about it. We must listen to the one whose relationship to His church is the model for it. Now, whenever we talk about marriage and divorce, I always want to emphasize that where we meet with God’s truth, THERE we embrace it and begin to uphold it. What our Lord teaches is challenging. It is convicting. For some of us it will be exposing. It will shine God’s light on past failures. Scripture always does this, on any and every subject. But my prayer for us, is that along with the pain that comes when we remember our sins, or the sins of others, there would be a HOLY JOY of knowing that in Christ Jesus I now can glorify God in this area of my life. It really isn’t about WHAT HAS BEEN (other than to agree with God about it). It is about WHAT WILL BE? Will I embrace God’s truth and live in the light of it, RIGHT NOW? Paul emphasized WALKING AT THE POINT WE MEET WITH THE LORD ON THE GROUND OF TRUTH. ESV 1 Corinthians 7:17 Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him. This is my rule in all the churches. 18 Was anyone at the time of his call already circumcised? Let him not seek to remove the marks of circumcision. Was anyone at the time of his call uncircumcised? Let him not seek circumcision. 19 For neither circumcision counts for anything nor uncircumcision, but keeping the commandments of God. 20 Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called. 21 Were you a bondservant when called? Do not be concerned about it. (But if you can gain your freedom, avail yourself of the opportunity.) 22 For he who was called in the Lord as a bondservant is a freedman of the Lord. Likewise he who was free when called is a bondservant of Christ. 23 You were bought with a price; do not become bondservants of men. 24 So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God. And so, where marital failure has occurred, and we were responsible for it — whether completely responsible, or partially responsible — and where it is not possible to make it right — then we confess our sin, and accept God’s forgiveness in Christ, and walk on. But as we walk forward, we don’t defend our performance; WE UPHOLD WHAT IS RIGHT AND TRUE. There is nothing ever gained by seeking to justify our sin. But there is much to gain (future generations are at stake — the view of marriage by our children and grandchildren is at stake) by embracing the humility that takes responsibility for our sins and upholds God’s truth. ONE OF THE GREAT DANGERS WE ALL FACE WHEN IT COMES TO OUR FAILURES IS THE DANGER OF EMBRACING A THEOLOGY THAT WOULD EXCUSE IT. To embrace a view of our failure that promises to ease our guilt, or to increase our freedom, BUT IS A FABRICATION. IT ISN’T TRUE. And because it isn’t true, it shuts us off from the mercy that is known on the other side of humble agreement with God.