Funeral March for my grandmother

On the 05.04.2025 my grandmother (father's mother) passed. She was born on the 24.02.1950 and during her life she was devoted to both her work and her children (my father and his sister). I sadly didn't get to learn much about who she was from her until it was too late - she began showing signs of dementia. It started off as her just forgetting simple stuff but quickly grew into not remembering whole conversations, periods of time and lastly people. I had visited her each month with my cousin and her fiancé and around October of last year she couldn't remember many things or if she could it was a fake version of them, woven whole by her own imagination. She had completely forgotten me by my visit in November, that was when I went to visit her for the last time - she was looking at me the same way a child looks at a random adult that they've been introduced to - an empty smile. After this interaction (and after lunch) I went outside to look at the nature, to think about what had happened.. and then it started - while I was lost in thought the only thing that was even more omnipresent than the nature around me was the melody that I myself had come up with a few months back for my grandmother's funeral. I hadn't finished it, for that felt like I'd be putting the nail on the coffin, but at that moment when I started hearing it, as if played through nature itself which was calling for her return, I inadvertently finished it, even if it was only in my mind at that time. I couldn't bring myself to see her again after that - she was not there, after all - just her shell. And even if I had brought myself to life made it so that I physically couldn't. The next time I saw her was last Monday - on the 07.04, that was when the funeral was held. We gathered at the house - all of the close relatives and some distant relatives that I've never seen before were there as well. We then went over to the cemetery where we learned that they'll bury her in her mother's grave, because there was apparently no more room. I got handed four flowers, hand-picked by my cousin from the house, which I held during the whole event. A priest came and he sung for about 10 minutes, 10 minutes that felt like an eternity - all I could do was stare at the ground. My ears were full of much noise, I was trying to process it all - the singing, my own thoughts, the echoing wind that was begging for her return to nature and this funeral march that was playing inside of my own head. Afterwards I left the flowers inside of the coffin and they took it away to put it in the ground, but before burying it all of us passed one by one, pouring a little bit of water and wine on the ground, as well as throwing a bit of dirt on the coffin. The only thought that ran through my head then was "You're finally free", I was glad that she didn't have to keep on existing as someone who wasn't even her. Afterwards me and my parents went to visit a nearby cave to, well - do something that would cleanse us from what happened.. I never really got to learn who she was.. and yet I miss her.. I hope she's better now For the piece: This is my original composition - a funeral march for my grandmother. I wrote the main part for it about half a year ago and although I can rewrite it to be even better I chose not to, because that's what I made for her back then and I wanted to keep it intact as much as possible. I wanted to play and record the piece myself, but it's still too much for me, so I synthesized it in fl studio and added sheet scrolling for the first time. I'll also upload a version of it for a string quartet later on as well as a recording of me playing it when I can bring myself to. I hope you'll enjoy this piece, even though the reason behind me making it is sad and I hope that all of this will help you deal with grief as well.. You're not alone I will upload more things soon - I have a few ready, but everything surrounding my grandmother happened and I couldn't bring myself to upload them then. Link to the sheets - https://musescore.com/user/28547437/s...