“I’m Just Bad at It”: When Learning Difficulties Start to Affect Confidence

When a child starts saying things like “I’m stupid,” “I’m rubbish at maths,” “I hate reading,” or “Everyone else can do it except me,” it can be incredibly difficult to hear as a parent. But what sits underneath those words? In this October episode of When Learning Feels Hard, dyslexia and dyscalculia specialist Katie Nelson explores what can happen when repeated difficulties with reading, writing or maths begin to affect the way a child sees themselves as a learner. Katie looks at why children often notice differences between themselves and their peers much earlier than we realise, how “this is difficult for me” can gradually become “I’m bad at this,” and why behaviours such as avoidance, rushing, frustration or saying “I don’t care” may be telling us something important. The episode explores both dyslexia and dyscalculia, including the impact that effort, repeated difficulty and maths anxiety can have on confidence. Katie also shares practical ways parents can respond when their child talks negatively about their abilities, how to open up conversations without immediately trying to fix the problem, and why protecting confidence doesn’t mean pretending learning isn’t difficult. Most importantly, this episode encourages parents to separate what a child finds difficult from who that child believes they are. For parents who would like more guidance and ongoing support, Katie also shares how to join the Parent Hub at the Dyslexia & Dyscalculia Academy, with practical resources, specialist conversations, Coffee & Clarity sessions and support to help you better understand your child and their learning. Difficulty is information. And when a child says, “I’m just bad at it,” there’s often much more underneath those words.