The Blind Captain's Voyage

[Intro] We found a ship beside the quay, A fine old vessel by the sea. The captain smiled beneath his hat, "Welcome aboard!" We should have left at that. A tricorn hat, a toothy grin, A blindfold hiding both his eyes within. The Bard just stared and whispered low: "Oh no... I think I know this guy." --- [Verse 1] The ropes were cast, the sails were tight, We left the harbor in morning light. The Barbarian cheered and raised his cup, The Elf climbed high and watched the sun come up. The Assassin vanished below the deck, The Cleric checked if we were still intact. The Alchemist examined every rope, While the Bard was already singing hope. The captain turned the wheel with pride, Though absolutely nothing could guide his sight. He shouted: "Full speed ahead!" The river bent... The ship did not. --- [Pre-Chorus] Through jungle rivers, green and wide, We shot between the cliffs and tide. The trees flew past, the deck went steep, The ship began to climb the deep! --- [Chorus] Hold on! Hold tight! We're flying through the jungle tonight! Left, right, up, down, We're the wildest ship around! Raise the sails! Don't ask why! Watch the waterfalls go flying by! Through every storm and every wave, The blindest captain leads the brave! HEY! --- [Verse 2] A tropical paradise appeared, With crystal rivers bright and clear. Exotic birds flew overhead, While half the crew was upside down instead. The Elf swung gracefully from the mast, The Barbarian grabbed a barrel as we passed. The Assassin somehow landed on the rail, While the Bard kept playing through the gale. The Cleric shouted: "We're going to crash!" The Alchemist answered: "Not if I ignite this flask!" A flash of green, a thunderous sound— And suddenly... We weren't on the ground. --- [Chorus] Hold on! Hold tight! We're sailing like a carnival ride! Over the waves and through the trees, Past waterfalls and giant seas! Raise the sails! Ring the bell! Nobody knows where this ship will dwell! The captain grins and turns the wheel— We haven't seen the ocean in an hour! --- [Verse 3 – The Cook] Below the deck, through all the noise, The ship's cook calmly chopped his choice. The ship rolled ninety degrees, He stirred his soup with perfect ease. The mast went crashing through the wall, He simply caught another bowl. The crew screamed: "WE'RE GOING DOWN!" He looked around without a frown. "Dinner's almost ready." And carried on. --- [Bridge – The Dimension Gates] Then suddenly the river split in two, And something strange came into view. A shining gate of endless stars, A doorway leading somewhere far. Blue galaxies began to spin, A thousand lights were burning within. The captain smiled: "I've sailed through one before." The crew cried: "YOU'VE DONE THIS BEFORE?! WE'RE GOING THROUGH A WHAT?! A DIMENSION DOOR!" The ship plunged through the shining gate, Reality forgot its proper shape. The stars became the ocean floor, The moon appeared beside the shore. For just one moment, standing there, A strange ninja wandered through the air. He calmly looked around and said: "Nice boat." Then disappeared. --- [Instrumental] [Verse 4] We burst back out above a sea, With giant clouds beneath our feet. The ship descended like a stone, Then somehow started flying on its own. The Barbarian laughed and grabbed the mast, The Elf flew by the sails so fast. The Witch raised shadows from the foam, The High Mage opened portals home. The Assassin landed on the bow, The Bard yelled: *"WHERE ARE WE NOW?!" The captain answered with delight: "I HAVE ABSOLUTELY NO IDEA! BUT THE COURSE FEELS RIGHT!" --- [Final Chorus] Hold on! Hold tight! We're sailing through another night! Through jungle, stars and endless skies, On a ship that should not fly! Raise the sails! Let chaos reign! Through dimensional storms and tropical rain! Wherever this cursed vessel goes, Nobody knows... BUT EVERYBODY KNOWS! The Blind Captain's back! The ship is off the track! The crew is screaming, The cook's still cooking! And somehow... We're coming back! --- [Outro] At dawn we reached a distant shore, Exhausted, soaked, and wanting more. The captain smiled beneath his hat: "Same ship tomorrow?" The crew yelled: "NO!" The cook opened up the galley door. "Breakfast." The Bard picked up his lute. The Barbarian raised his cup. The Elf checked her bow. The Assassin vanished. The Alchemist lit a fuse. And somewhere far beyond the stars... That strange ninja was still smiling. Fade out — lute, accordion, distant bagpipes, crashing waves.