The Secret To Being Magnetic To Everything You Want | Margarita Nazarenko

You do not have to chase what is meant for you. Sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is step back... and let it come to you. In this episode of The Balance Theory, Erika sits down with Margarita Nazarenko, author of Unbothered: The Art of Letting Go to Find Yourself and host of the BEING HER podcast, to unpack what it means to detach. Margarita shares how she moved from anxious attachment to feeling secure and why anxious and avoidant attachment styles stem from the same fear. Detachment is not about becoming cold or pretending you do not care. It is about letting go of others' perceptions so you can live as yourself. If you have ever caught yourself thinking: "Why hasn't he replied yet?" "I am doing everything right, so why is nothing working?" "What did I do wrong?" "I care so much about what people think of me." "I am always doing everything for everyone." Then this episode is for you. Erika and Margarita cover: • How Margarita went from anxious attachment to feeling secure and confident • Why chasing approval and validation pushes away what you want • The 4 steps to stop abandoning yourself, including the 60 minute hack • How to identify whose approval you are chasing and why • What being unbothered really means and why it is not being avoidant • The good girl tax and the cost of always being useful but never happy • How to reinvent yourself and handle others' reactions • Friendship circles and family proximity zones that ease relationship pressure • A writing exercise to separate reality from the story in your head • Why motherhood brings new challenges and what an unbothered man looks like When you stop chasing and start choosing yourself, you make room for everything you want to find you. Filmed at Pivotal Conversations Studios   / pivotalconversations   Book a session: https://www.pivotalconversations.ai SPONSORS Thank you to the sponsors who made today's episode possible: 🤖 GRANOLA: Try Granola for FREE - Go to https://www.granola.ai/BALANCE and try it on your next call. 🍳 CARAWAY: Visit ⁠https://www.carawayhome.com/BALANCE⁠ or use code 'BALANCE' at checkout to take an additional 10% off your next purchase 🪥 OLLIE: Go to https://olliesmile.com and enter code 'BALANCE' for 10% off your order! 📚 WALDEN: Take the first step and learn at a pace that works for you. Visit https://www.waldenu.edu/ CONNECT WITH OUR GUEST 📸 Instagram -   / margarita.nazarenko   YouTube -    / @margarita.nazarenko   TIME STAMPS (00:00) Introduction (05:40) This Is WHY I wasn't getting anything I wanted (07:55) What did you have to stop doing? (8:26) 4 steps to stop abandoning yourself (16:03) Working out whose approval you're chasing (18:14 ) How to be unbothered (19:37) Anxious v Avoidant attachment styles (22:49) Good girl tax (25:58) How do I change who I've always been? (33:15) What responsibility do we have to be considerate of others? (35:25) How do you deal with fall out with others when you change? (37:50) Try these 'proximity zones' with family (40:28) 4 zones in your friendships to learn (42:35) Start here to become unbothered/detached today (50:05) Why does motherhood bother you? (52:29) Should you teach kids to be unbothered? (55:37) This surprised me the most (57:35) What would an unbothered man look like? ( 1:04:22) Would you use an AI Twin? WHO AM I? I’m Erika, an Australian living in Dubai, a mum and the creator and host of this podcast. After almost a decade in law, I’ve stepped into a new chapter centred on what I love - helping people design and implement the architecture they need to live their dream life. As someone with big ambitions, I’m passionate about pursuing what matters and to do so, we need to create our own lives intentionally. This channel is a space for honest conversations, curiosity and practical tools to support that journey. Welcome - I’m glad you’re here. 📸 My personal IG -   / erikadpelle   LINKS ▶︎ WEEKLY NEWSLETTER: https://thebalancetheory.com ▶︎ Find your Episode QUIZ: https://thebalancetheory.com/balance ▶︎ My FREE Work Life Balance Workshop:    • How to ACTUALLY Have Work Life Balance in ...   ▶︎ 25 Day Self Development Marathon: https://bit.ly/4cpHmcV ▶︎ 21 Day Self Growth Challenge: https://bit.ly/46CoiqR ▶︎ MORE RESOURCEs: https://thebalancetheory.com/shop LET’S BE FRIENDS ⭐ Substack - https://thebalancetheorypodcast.subst... 📸 Instagram -   / thebalancetheorypodcast   📱Tiktok -   / thebalancetheorypodcast   🌍 My website - https://thebalancetheory.com 🧡 This description contains affiliate links that allow you to find the items mentioned in this video and support the channel at no cost to you. Thank you for your support!